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What is a Modern Funeral?

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13 minute read

For centuries, funeral traditions have followed a familiar path. But as society evolves, so do the ways we commemorate and say goodbye to the people we love. Today, many people are seeking alternatives that align with more modern values, like simplicity, affordability and environmental consciousness.

This article explores the journey from traditional funerals to direct cremation, a modern funeral option that removes many of the logistical and financial burdens that families often face in times of grief.

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Live streaming has become an integral part of modern funerals

Modern funerals: a new way to say goodbye

Modern funerals represent a departure from British funeral traditions, changing the expectations of what happens at a funeral historically; emphasising openness, creativity, and flexibility. Unlike traditional funerals, often rooted in fixed cultural or religious customs, modern funerals use a more personalised approach, intended to celebrate life in unique and meaningful ways.

The shift from tradition to modernity

For many people, a “traditional funeral” brings common themes to mind: pallbearers in formal attire, a hearse adorned with flowers, mourners dressed in black, and a wake where family and friends gather to pay their respects. While these elements provide comfort and closure for some, for others, the traditional approach can feel overwhelming, particularly in the immediate stages of a bereavement.

A traditional funeral often requires extensive planning and coordination at a time when families may be least prepared to handle it. In addition to the emotional toll, traditional funerals can also involve significant costs. These costs typically include service fees, embalming, limousines, hearses, a premium coffin, and wake expenses like catering and venue hire. According to SunLife’s Cost of Dying Report, the average funeral cost last year was £4,285, a significant amount for many families.

The many elements that are involved in a traditional funeral often require quick decisions in an emotionally charged period, and this can sometimes add more stress than comfort. This financial and logistical strain has led many families to seek alternatives that offer more simplicity and flexibility.

Evolving perspectives

These societal changes, as well as changing beliefs on death and funerals in religion have prompted families to rethink how they mourn their loved ones.

Direct cremation has become a popular choice, allowing families to take a breath, make the arrangements that are required in the immediate stages after a death, and then come together and commemorate that person’s life when they feel physically, emotionally or financially able to. This modern funeral alternative embraces diversity, focusing on the unique attributes and values of the person who has died.

For example, instead of processions, you may encounter some very different funeral etiquette than most have gotten used to, including joyous celebrations filled with the person’s favourite music, food, or and DIY funeral elements like a hand-decorated coffin. 

The rise of non-religious funerals in the UK

Following a decline of religion in the UK, modern families are becoming increasingly diverse, encompassing a variety of beliefs and lifestyles. Non-religious funeral services provide a more neutral platform, ensuring everyone feels comfortable and included, regardless of faith or background. Moreover, they resonate with the ethos of modern life—emphasising individuality, creativity, and the freedom to choose.

Unlike religious funerals, which typically feature prayers, scriptures, and hymns rooted in a specific faith, non-religious services centre around more customised elements like anecdotes, poetry, and music. While these elements can also be included in religious ceremonies, they take on a more prominent role in non-religious funerals, forming the central focus of the gathering.

 

What sets modern funerals apart?

Personalisation and customisation

A hallmark of the modern funeral is their ability to reflect the individual personalities of those who have died. Families are encouraged to incorporate elements that represent their loved one’s passions, values, and achievements. This could range from bespoke floral arrangements to themed ceremonies. For example, a motor enthusiast may have their service centred around vintage cars, or the service for a person whose passion was the natural world might take place in a woodland setting.

Music, often deeply emotional, has taken centre stage in modern ceremonies. Families may curate playlists featuring their loved ones’ favourite songs, or even arrange a live band to perform, moving away from popular traditional funeral hymns to more contemporary and personal choices.

Diverse cultural influences

Globalisation and multiculturalism have greatly enriched modern funeral practices. Today’s ceremonies often incorporate rituals from different traditions. At a modern funeral ceremony, you might witness elements of a Buddhist water ceremony alongside Western-style eulogies, creating an interesting and one-of-a-kind service.

This blend of traditions embraces the interconnected nature of our world, allowing families from diverse backgrounds to create services that feel truly meaningful and fitting to them.

Technology in modern funerals

Advancements in technology have influenced funeral practices in recent times. Live streaming and virtual memorials enable remote participation, meaning that distance is no longer a barrier. Families can now display digital photo tributes or create memorial websites where attendees can share memories and messages.

Social media platforms and the ‘digital afterlife’ also play a role, with private groups or pages acting as virtual spaces for mourning and celebration. These technological innovations have expanded access, providing greater inclusivity for families spread across the globe.

Aura’s free membership platform, the Aura Circle, provides tools for you to arrange essential details, share messages for significant dates, and share your life story, while also encouraging others to add their cherished memories.

 

Contemporary approaches to funerals

Direct cremation

Direct cremation is a simple, no-fuss modern funeral alternative. The person who has died is usually taken into the care of the funeral director, and the cremation takes place privately without the presence of a service or any attendees. Afterwards, the ashes are returned to the family, who can choose to commemorate their loved one’s life at a time that feels right for them.

The popularity of direct cremation grew significantly following the COVID-19 pandemic, as restrictions on gatherings led many families to reconsider their traditional expectations. This shift also reflected a change in many people’s values and circumstances. In lots of cases, individuals experienced a huge amount of pressure and distress after organising a funeral for someone close to them, and they didn’t want to place the same burden on the people they loved when their time came.

Financial concerns have also influenced a significant change in funeral planning. With the cost of funerals rising each year, direct cremation became a low-cost cremation choice for those wishing to avoid the expenses of hearses, limousines and other formal arrangements. 

As a society we are also becoming more environmentally conscious, making decisions on how we can leave this world with as little environmental impact as possible. By reducing elements such as the harmful chemicals used for embalming, and the reduced land usage saved from burials, direct cremation can meet the needs of those who are looking to make more sustainable decisions.

For those who wish for an honourable sendoff without the complexities of a full funeral service, but still have hesitation and may be questioning: ‘Is direct cremation a good idea?’ it may be worth looking into these types of services as a potential option.

Living funerals and celebrations of life

A growing trend, living funerals or celebrations of life allow people to be present for their own end-of-life celebrations. Often held while the person is still alive, these gatherings focus on appreciating the present, creating connection, and celebrating achievements.

For instance, a terminally ill person might invite friends and family to gather, share stories, and enjoy their favourite activities, creating a memory that resonates beyond their death.

This major shift is the replacement or addition to the more sombre tone of the usual funeral ceremonies with vibrant celebrations and laughter. Families and friends gather to share happy memories, commonly in comforting or casual settings such as a beloved outdoor area or park, or a loved one’s back garden. These celebrations can provide closure, create a sense of community, and focus on the person’s life rather than their death.

Eco-friendly options

Green funerals are another defining feature of modern practices. Biodegradable coffins, natural burial grounds, and sustainable urns are increasingly popular among families seeking environmentally conscious options.

Direct cremation, once considered unconventional, has also gained traction, with its more simple process resulting in a reduction of overall environmental impact.

Alternative venues and formats

The traditional crematorium or place-of-worship setting is no longer the default location for ceremonies. For alternative funerals, families can now opt for parks, beaches, or even private homes to create intimate and memorable experiences. Smaller gatherings focused on authenticity and connection are gradually replacing larger, formal services.

Funeral plans

Pre-planning your funeral has become a modern way to be sure that personal wishes are respected. Prepaid funeral plans allow you to choose your services and pay in advance, reducing financial and potential emotional stress on your loved ones.

These plans also allow you to secure today’s prices, shielding loved ones from possible future cost increases.

The regulation of funeral plans by the Financial Conduct Authority ensures they are trustworthy and transparent. It’s vital to feel confident when setting money aside, and these regulations uphold strict standards to guarantee ethical practices, responsible fund management, and the delivery of services as promised.

Direct cremations and funeral plans with Aura

Aura provides both direct cremations for those with an immediate need, and prepaid direct cremation funeral plans for those planning ahead. Our straightforward direct cremations exclude the ceremonial aspects like hearses and pallbearers, allowing families to focus on personal ways to honour their loved one’s memory. Managed with care and respect, our dedicated team of Aura Angels ensures every step is handled seamlessly, providing a stress-free experience for families during what can be a difficult time.

Similarly, our prepaid funeral plans offer a forward-thinking approach to modern funerals, blending affordability, flexibility, and customisation. These plans allow you to take control of your end-of-life arrangements, making sure your wishes will be respected while easing possible financial and emotional stresses on loved ones. 

For those who are looking for a modern alternative with some traditional elements, Aura also provides attended services for those in immediate need and planning for the future.  For a more intimate funeral, there is the option for attended direct cremations; families are empowered to create heartfelt goodbyes that truly reflect the lives being honoured. Backed by a 5-star rating from Fairer Finance, Aura’s plans combine trust, care, and a modern outlook to make funeral planning accessible to all.

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What modern funeral practices look like

Legacy projects

Legacy projects, such as memoirs or life stories, charitable contributions, or digital tributes, have also gained popularity. These projects provide families a tangible way to honour their loved ones while creating lasting memories.

Modern memorialisation

Memorialisation has evolved significantly in recent years, blending traditional practices with innovative approaches to remember loved ones. Today, modern memorialisation offers personalised and unique options, slowly replacing traditional headstones:

Keepsake jewellery

Memorial jewellery is a heartfelt way to honour a loved one, offering beautiful cremation ashes ideas by encasing a small portion of their remains into personalised necklaces, rings, bracelets and more. Though the idea of ‘mourning jewellery’ is not a new one,  the industry continues to expand and evolve. 

Memory boxes

Memory boxes are personalised containers designed to store cherished mementos, such as photos, letters, and keepsakes, providing a tangible way to preserve and remember a loved one’s legacy.

Digital memorials

Digital memorials are online spaces where loved ones can share memories, photos, messages, and tributes, creating a lasting virtual legacy to honour someone who has died.

 

The changing role of funeral professionals

Personalised services

Funeral directors have embraced a more personalised approach, guiding families through their options and accommodating specific requests, such as the desire to involve a celebrant to officiate rather than a religious leader, for example. Services now often include tailored support, such as referral to grief counselling or event planning assistance.

The growing demand for death doulas

Death doulas are end-of-life professionals trained to support the dying and their families. They provide emotional and practical assistance, ensuring a more gentle and supported transition, and fostering meaningful moments in the final stages of life.

Modern funeral planners

Specialised planners are growing in demand to help families navigate the sometimes complex choices associated with modern funerals. From sourcing unique venues to managing logistics, it is their job to see that every detail aligns with the family or person’s vision.

 

Understanding the perspective of attendees

Expectations and comfort

To uphold the expectations and comfort of mourners at a modern funeral, organisers can:

Provide clear communication: Share detailed information about the service, including location, timings, dress code, and special requests, to make attendees feel prepared and at ease.

Create comfortable spaces: Make sure the venue is accessible, with adequate seating, climate control (when possible), and facilities, to accommodate all guests comfortably.

Offer remote participation: If you feel comfortable with it, you may consider providing live streaming or recorded options for those unable to attend in person, ensuring everyone feels included.

Incorporate keepsakes: You might wish to distribute small tokens, such as memory cards or personalised mementos. This is a very modern way to help attendees feel connected to the service.

Balancing tradition and modernity

Striking a balance between tradition and modernity can be challenging. Families often blend cultural practices with contemporary elements, such as incorporating traditional blessings into an otherwise casual gathering.

Modern funerals reflect the changing needs of society, offering a more inclusive, meaningful, and personalised approach to saying goodbye. By embracing these practices, families can create a celebration that truly honours their loved one’s life and legacy, and speaks to the person they were in life.

 

Aura is here for you

At Aura, we understand that planning a funeral is deeply personal, and can come with a host of questions, concerns, and emotions. When Paul Jameson founded Aura, he envisioned providing uncomplicated, honest funeral services to families in need of support, respect, and meaningful ways to honour their loved ones or plan ahead, all while easing the emotional and financial pressures during what can be a difficult time.

We’re here to bring that vision to life and to support you every step of the way, whether you’re in need of immediate assistance, or you’re planning ahead. 

Our compassionate team is ready to guide you with care and expertise whenever you feel ready; let us help you create a goodbye  that reflects the values, memories, and legacy that matter most to you and your family.

Debs Fowler
Debs
Tamsin Ferrier
Tamsin
Roderick Beresford Cole
Roderick
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Unlike other providers, we won’t hassle you with constant calls. We’ll simply ensure you have the information you need and leave you to come to a decision in your own time. When you’re ready for us, our team will be ready to help.

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