Living Funeral Ideas: Attend Your Own Funeral

Imagine having the chance to celebrate your life with the people who matter most, while you’re still here to see their smiles, hear their laughter, and feel their love. That’s exactly what a living funeral offers for those who wish to break away from the typical traditional goodbyes. 

Attending your own ‘funeral’ allows you to embrace the moments that truly matter; sharing gratitude and memories in an atmosphere of celebration. This concept isn’t about focusing on loss, it’s all about cherishing life and the relationships that define it.

You might be here because you’re looking for a meaningful way to honour your life or the life of someone you care about. Perhaps you’re seeking a way to celebrate milestones, share cherished memories, or create a space for loved ones to come together before saying goodbye. Whatever has brought you here, exploring living funeral ideas is a testament to your courage in facing life’s most difficult moments with love and purpose.

What is a Living Funeral?

A living funeral, sometimes called a ‘celebration of life’, ‘pre-funeral,’ or ‘living wake’ is a unique gathering that offers people the chance to celebrate their life and connect with loved ones before they die. Unlike traditional funerals, which are held after death, a living funeral is an opportunity to hear heartfelt tributes, share laughter and tears, and create lasting memories with those you cherish most.

The purpose of these gatherings goes beyond the conventional mourning of loss—instead, it’s about celebrating the life you’ve lived and acknowledging your impact on those around you. For attendees, it provides a chance to express love, gratitude, and closure. For the honouree, it can be a deeply moving opportunity to feel appreciated, reflect on your life, and perhaps share your hopes or wisdom with those who will carry your legacy forward after you’re gone.

Reasons to hold a living funeral

You might be wondering: why have a living funeral? For some, the idea of a living funeral feels a little too unfamiliar – so different from how funerals are usually done that it might seem hard to imagine. But for those who choose to have one, it can be a deeply meaningful way to celebrate life with the people they love. Here are a few reasons why someone might choose to have a living funeral:  

• Closure for loved ones: A living funeral gives loved ones a chance to share their feelings, express gratitude, and say anything they would rather not leave unsaid. Unlike traditional funerals, where the focus is often on loss, a living funeral allows direct communication with the person being celebrated. This experience can help ease regrets from unspoken words or unresolved emotions, offering closure that is both heartwarming and healing. It also allows family and friends to begin processing their grief while creating lasting, positive memories to carry forward.
• Celebrating life: These events shift the focus from loss to celebrating the moments that have defined your life. It’s an opportunity to reflect on your achievements, revisit cherished memories, share your life story, and embrace the connections you’ve built. It’s a beautiful way to remind everyone of the value of the experiences you’ve shared together and the impact they’ve had on your life.
• Expressing gratitude: A living funeral provides a unique opportunity to thank the people who have helped shape your life. In this intimate setting, you can express appreciation to loved ones for their support, kindness, and the roles they’ve played. Sharing these feelings face-to-face creates meaningful moments of connection, strengthening bonds and leaving a lasting impact. It’s a powerful way to celebrate relationships and acknowledge how much others have contributed to your happiness and sense of purpose.
• A growing trend: In recent years, living funerals have emerged as a growing trend, reflecting a shift in how people approach end-of-life planning. For those asking, “Do you have to have a funeral?”, Living funerals provide an alternative. Many are choosing to take control of their final send-off, transforming it into a reflection of their personality, values and life story. These events empower people to make sure their wishes are honoured while allowing them to witness the love and appreciation of those around them. As society moves toward more modern funerals and personalised, meaningful ways to celebrate life, these gatherings are redefining the narrative around death—focusing on connection, gratitude, and joy.
• Simplicity: For those who prefer an alternative funeral, direct cremation or no traditional service at all, a living funeral can be an ideal choice. Unlike conventional funeral options, this gathering happens on your terms—whether it’s a quiet get-together at home or a small celebration in a place that’s special to you. For those who value simplicity or wish to avoid a formal ceremony, a living funeral provides an opportunity to connect with those closest to you in a way that feels personal, heartfelt and true to your wishes.

A personal farewell: combining living funerals with direct cremation

A living funeral pairs seamlessly with direct cremation, as it offers a simple and affordable way to focus on celebrating your life in a way that truly reflects who you are. It allows you to bring loved ones together to share memories and laughter while you’re still here to experience the moment with them.

When the time comes, a direct cremation provides a dignified, no-fuss option, giving your family the space to grieve without the formalities of a traditional funeral. Free from making big decisions at an emotionally-charged time, direct cremation allows them to say goodbye in a way that feels right—knowing they have already shared in a meaningful celebration of your life.

Aura’s direct cremations

Aura’s direct cremation services offer a simple, affordable, and respectful alternative to traditional funerals, with no funeral service or mourners in attendance. Following a living funeral, families may choose to opt for an unattended cremation, but here at Aura we also offer both intimate attended and fully attended options if your loved ones would like to say a final goodbye at the crematorium.

Direct cremation takes care of all essential arrangements, including transportation, cremation, and the return of ashes, while keeping funeral costs significantly lower than the average UK funeral, which Sunlife puts at £4,285. We pride ourselves on delivering compassionate, professional care, ensuring every step is handled with empathy and understanding. 

Whether paired with a private gathering or chosen for its simplicity, our direct cremations allow families to focus on what truly matters.

Planning ahead with Aura’s prepaid funeral plans

If you are considering hosting a living funeral, you might also be thinking about planning other aspects of your end-of-life matters. Some choose to do that with prepaid funeral plans, which allow you to pay for and arrange your funeral ahead of time, and lock in today’s prices. This not only provides you with peace of mind, but can relieve those left behind from financial worries during what can be a difficult time.

Aura’s plans can help you take control of your end-of-life arrangements by helping you plan in advance, ensuring that the practical details of your funeral are taken care of, leaving your loved ones free to focus on celebrating your life. We are regulated by the Financial Conduct Authority (FCA), and our plans are protected by the Financial Services Compensation Scheme (FSCS). You can rest assured that, when you purchase a prepaid funeral plan from Aura, your money is secure.

As you compare funeral plans and direct cremation prices, it’s important to consider what matters most to you, whether it’s affordability, flexibility, or making sure your final wishes are honoured with care and dignity. Our plans can not only provide a feeling of calm, but also allow you to design a service that reflects your personality and values. Whether it’s a vibrant living funeral or an intimate gathering, our prepaid options empower you to create a meaningful experience tailored to your needs and wants. 

How to plan a living funeral

Choosing the right setting

The setting establishes the tone and comfort for your attendees. Consider a location that feels personal and comfortable for you, whether it’s your home, a serene garden or a favourite community space. Think about creating a welcoming environment by considering accessibility, convenient travel distances for your guests and ensuring the arrangements align with your comfort and well-being. Some people even choose hybrid or virtual ceremonies, allowing distant loved ones to join and share in the experience. 

What matters most is creating a space where you feel at ease, surrounded by those who mean the most to you.

Involving professionals

Incorporating professionals into your living funeral planning can help the event go forward seamlessly, setting it up to be the most meaningful and stress-free gathering possible. You might consider involving the following professionals:

1. Celebrants or officiants – Celebrants or other officiants, such as religious leaders, can help by leading the gathering and creating a service that properly reflects your beliefs, wishes, and structure for the day.
2. Event planners – Specialised planners can organise venues, themes and schedules, making it easier to focus on other aspects of the event.
3. Catering services – Utilising a catering service removes the potential stress of providing food, if needed, to guests. 
4. Musicians or performers – Musical performances or other entertainment can add a personal touch, and will be remembered long after the event has passed.
5. Videographers or photographers – These professionals capture moments for keepsakes or for those unable to attend.
6. Artists or craftspeople – You might think about hiring artists or other craftspeople to help design personalised mementos, decorations or creative stations for guests.
7. Florists – Florists can create stunning floral arrangements that enhance the setting and overall feel.
8. Audio-visual technicians – These experts in visuals and sound can manage video presentations, slideshows, music or virtual attendance for remote guests. Having them around may reduce stress if you’re not a particularly technical person.

Whether it’s coordinating speeches, music or catering, professionals can take care of the practicalities, allowing you and your loved ones to fully engage in the celebration without distraction.

Selecting a theme or tone

When narrowing down the way you want your living funeral to look and feel, think about what best reflects your personality and values. Would you prefer a light-hearted, celebratory event full of laughter? Or perhaps a reflective, spiritual ceremony? Are any specific components or ‘props’ important to you?

Incorporating your hobbies, passions or cultural traditions can make the event even more personal. For example, a book lover might choose readings from their favourite novels, while a nature enthusiast might opt for an outdoor ceremony with a tree planting.

Inviting guests and preparing the program

Deciding who to invite can be a difficult process. A smaller, intimate group often feels more meaningful, but then again, you might prefer to include everyone who has been part of your journey. It’s up to you to decide who you want to include, but remember, this is primarily for you.

Once the guest list is settled, plan the flow of the event, if you wish to leave it more structured. Speeches, photo displays, video tributes and shared memories are all beautiful elements. Consider preparing your guests by explaining the purpose and tone of the gathering—this prepares them to arrive with the appropriate mindset and manner.

Ideas for a meaningful living funeral ceremony

Personal touches

Adding personal details makes a living funeral unforgettable. Some ideas include:

• Sharing milestones, life stories or achievements.
• Encouraging attendees to write letters or record video messages.
• Creating keepsakes, like a memory box filled with photos or handwritten notes.

These small touches are sure to be appreciated by all who attend.

Symbolic gestures

Symbolic acts can be a powerful way to convey meaning or a specific message. Here are a few suggestions:

• Lighting candles: Symbolising the light and warmth you’ve brought to others’ lives.
• Planting trees or other plants: An enduring gesture of life continuing and growing even after you’re gone.
• Biodegradable lantern release – Instead of balloons, use biodegradable floating lanterns or flower petals in a body of water as a gentle and symbolic gesture.
• Seed paper letters – Guests can write messages on biodegradable seed paper, which can be planted afterward to grow wildflowers or trees in memory of the person.
• Upcycled memory quilt or clothing swap – Transform the loved one’s clothing into a quilt, or encourage attendees to take an item to keep and cherish, reducing waste and giving sentimental value to their possessions

Incorporate music, poetry or even your favourite movie quotes to make the ceremony even more special.

Group engagement 

• Open microphone for sharing stories and tributes: Give loved ones the chance to share heartfelt stories, memories and tributes in their own words.
• Memory-sharing circles: Create an intimate and open space for guests to reflect and exchange cherished memories together.
• Raise a toast: Raise a glass to celebrate the life and legacy of the person being celebrated.
• Group activities or games: Encourage connection and laughter through shared activities that reflect the person’s character.
• Craft stations for creating keepsakes: Provide a creative way for guests to make personalised mementos to remember the day.

Common challenges in organising a living funeral

Addressing emotional concerns

Discussing end-of-life matters can feel overwhelming for you and your loved ones, and open communication is key. Let your family and friends know why this event matters to you and encourage them to share their thoughts and feelings if they feel comfortable enough to do so. You might even schedule in time for breaks for resting or quiet moments, as such intense and social interactions, while lovely, can feel draining after some times.

To make everyone feel more at ease, consider enlisting the help of a counsellor, celebrant or spiritual leader to guide the event.

Managing logistics

While the event is very personal, the logistics can get tricky. From setting a budget to organising the guest list and program, having a clear plan can help. You might think about enlisting help from family members, friends or professional event planners to keep everything on track. 

Examples of memorable living funerals

Living funerals can be extremely personal, reflecting the unique lives they celebrate. A teacher might hold their ceremony at school among students and colleagues, while someone with strong cultural roots could incorporate traditional songs or dances. Gardeners may choose to have loved ones plant flowers in their honour, creating a lasting tribute, and music lovers might prefer a gathering with live performances or a playlist of their favourite songs. These thoughtful touches bring people together, creating a meaningful and uplifting farewell.

Living funeral ideas

Event themes
When we think of funerals, traditional rituals often come to mind. A living funeral, however, offers the opportunity to move beyond convention, creating an event moulded to someone’s one-of-a-kind story. This freedom can be expressed by specific themes, if desired. For instance, if someone particularly loved the 1920s, the event could include stylistic elements from that period in time.

Honouring life passions
Celebrate hobbies and interests by centering the event around what was loved most. For a cooking enthusiast, a party revolving around great food, or a cooking competition could be a fun way for attendees to connect and share. For a person who loves painting, perhaps there’s a live painter performing whilst the event goes on.

Craft decorations or other DIY projects
DIY decorations can add a handmade touch to the celebration. Whether you create these yourself or as a group activity with family and friends, the process can be both healing and meaningful. Consider making photo garlands, floral arrangements, or custom candles infused with scents that you love. 

Add a themed dress code
Instead of traditional black attire, a celebration of life can embrace colour and creativity with a themed dress code. Invite guests to dress in a specific colour or style, or even opt for fancy dress that fits in with the theme of the living funeral. 

A living funeral on a budget

Traditional funerals can be costly, but a living funeral doesn’t have to be expensive to be the perfect event. Humble gatherings like bring-a-dish dinners or bake-offs allow everyone to contribute, sharing both the costs and the happiness of being together with loved ones.

For someone who loves dogs, consider organising a dog-friendly gathering at a local park or their favourite walking trail. Invite friends and family to bring their dogs along for a group walk, creating a joyful atmosphere filled with wagging tails and happy energy.

After the walk, set up a small area for guests to share stories about the person’s love for dogs and how it impacted their life. If the person supported an animal charity, consider incorporating a donation drive in their honour, allowing their passion for dogs to leave a lasting impact.

Planning for the future with Aura

Planning for the future, whether organising a living funeral or a direct cremation or both, can be a personal and sometimes confronting process. Aura’s services provide a simple and compassionate way to ensure your wishes are honoured and respected, and offers the flexibility and affordability to create a send-off that feels true to you.

With the support of Aura Angels, our experienced and empathetic funeral arranging team, you can trust that every detail will be handled with the utmost care and professionalism. Choosing direct cremation allows you and your loved ones to focus on what truly matters: celebrating the life of the person you love.